Doesn't all wrestling lead to sex?

I agree with the posts below. If the guy had said something sooner, maybe he could have been stopped before hurting others. But maybe not since it took place at that clown show, PSU

.

When one sees the number of molesters that get away, because its one man's word against a child's word. No evidence? let him go. He was a well known figure, spent a lot of time with that charitable organization, took kids to games, etc. What might have been worse is if they didn't have all this evidence, all of these victims, if this young man had come out and not been believed. Imagine what that would do? At least now, there are a whole bunch of victims, a few witnesses, it has added up.

It's a shame, aside from the sexual abuse perpetrated by Sandusky it seems the Second Mile charity actually did a lot of good. The bastard's perversion ruined a system that was helping kids and now they'll have nothing. For every 1 victim I'm sure there were dozens that benefited from the charity, I'm not saying the bastard shouldn't fry - I'm just saying the charity did do good.

People talk about evil Obama, evil government, evil this and that, but they are so brainwashed by sports and other sit on your butt entertainment that they let child molesters do bad stuff and get away with it, because after all the JoePop and his boys would never do anything bad would they, this is what i have read about this that is the most fun http://www.rosebudmag.com/truth-squad/jerry-sandusky-child-molestation-contraceptives-pedophiles-abortion

I hope Sandusky doesnt get away with this, but money talks. I will wait and see what happens. I hope he doesnt walk.

Doesn't all wrestling lead to sex?

Only if she let's me win.

Not that I am saying that this guy is lying, but if his story is so true and believable, then why didn't he testify at the trial?!?! Sandusky obviously did some things that were completely inappropriate, but if this guy's story is true, he is the first one to state publicly that the behavior included actual sex acts. You would think that this would be pretty damning testimony. Or is this the one where they showed that he could not possibly have been at the game when he claimed the abuse took place. I know that at least one of the accusers was proven to be a liar based on travel records, is this him and is this why he did not testify. Is it because the DA knew he was lying and did not want to taint the rest of the witness statements with testimony that was a provable lie?!?! I am not saying that all of the kids are lying, I am just questioning why this guy did not testify at the trial if his story is true??? Is he one of the me too types looking for a payout, hoping to make a quick buck with a settlement because he will just get paid with the rest, whether he can prove his story or not. I do not like when these guys will go on national TV but will not testify in court where their stories can be challenged and cross examined. He damages the credibility of every other witness with his actions.

Only if she let's me win.

I let her win...

JS in SD, I wondered the same thing. I wish this article would have addressed the question of why this victim didn't testify in the criminal trial.

JS, since you don't know why they didn't have him testify, how about dropping the idea he is lying unless you have evidence? There are many reasons they could have not had him testify. They may not have liked his presentation in that others were more sympathetic to the jurors, he may have been really angry and they might have worried he would scare jurors, he may have been unclear on dates or not have had dates to give since he said it happened so often, they may have felt they had plenty that were more verifiable date-wise or that they weren't still numb as he says he is or a hundred other reasons.

They often don't have all victims of a perpetrator testify, especially if there are several and some seem really strong cases. This doesn't mean they don't believe him...you are inferring something that just isn't there.

And it really doesn't matter if YOU like it or not whether someone testifies or not. By the way, you are wrong saying he wouldn't testify. He said he would and would later if need be. He looks pretty angry to me, and if things happened as he said and he is just coming to terms with it now of course he is numb, angry, feeling guilty, etc., and this doesn't mean he is lying.

The article states that he did testify in front of the grand jury but was not called as a witness in this trial. It never states that he did not want to testify.

JasonInNYC, It is really hard when people who are molested as children, they don't really know it until they grow up. They are scared, confused and still don't know about sex to know fully what was done to them. How could they not know they fuked up, again, again, and again ..... JasonInNYC are just an I.d.i.o.t

I don't know ram-762581 but since none of us have heard direct testemony or actually are involved then perhaps nothing should be said either way about anything. The media has painted a picture of guilt to sell news since this all started and in fact the first reported to break it made false statements aleging Sanduskys guilt. That is why the DA never took the case and thats why nothing was done at Penn State. The evidence did not add up to enough to bring any charges against him. So much on this board and others has had Sandusky lynched a 100 times over for things that in fact may not of ever happened. I agree with what I have read it doesn't look good for him and if these things are true send him away for a long time but I will let the court and the jury who actually heard the case decide not an over zealous reporter and some past clients looking for the spotlight.

Seriously, don't get me wrong here. Sandusky is a monster and will get a long prison sentence. Maybe I missed something, but if I were hearing this guy's testimony, I would ask, 'How does a 14 year old move to another town to get away?'

@KarlStevens-2597445...that link on Rosebud was one of the best pieces I've ever read on pedophilia and American society. Thanks for posting it.

Perhaps the 14 year old ran away with another pediphile?

It's likely that what happened to him was too long ago to be able to be charged, (statute of limitations) which is why he couldn't have been involved in this trial. Because he now has no legal recourse, his only ability to get some "justice" is through the civil courts.

Additionally, I'm pretty sure it was the basketball coach from Syracuse that had the accuser who they found actually had not traveled to a particular location with him, and he subsequently admitted he had not been abused by that coach, not one of the Sandusky accusers.

Avenger, all I said was that we don't know why they decided to use the others and not his. I seriously doubt this man is the one you mean who said it wasn't Sandusky, since that wouldn't be hard to prove. My point was that assuming this man (or any of them) made it up, is lying, or was mistaken on dates is just guessing since, as you said, is just a guess. I have known witnesses in cases where they actually saw the crime committed, but since others saw it too and they had DNA they didn't have all the witnesses testify. They picked ones who didn't get all angry, confused, or were annoying so they could win the case more easily. So I was just saying why start saying this or that is probably why and insult the guy unless we actually saw all the material the DA did?

And Jed has a point...it could be past time his testimony could bring a conviction on that particular charge.

Umm, the boy could leave town if parents, foster parents, or someone else he stayed with moved, you know?

I applaud this guy for his interview, he is a brave, brave man. Nobody knows how hard this is to talk about unless it's happened to you. He didn't testify because the charges were already filed when he came forward. I'm glad he finally did come forward, but I'm sure it was filled with much emotion. God bless him!

Though I applaud the abused for coming forward, it bears clarification when he states that he "moved away from the area when he was 14" to get away from the slimeball. How does a 14 year old move without telling an adult why?

Jed - you are almost right. It was the Assistant Coach from 'Cuse. Boeheim was never accused. :) And outside of the guy who lied, it was the two people who had accused him before, and after a thorough investigation it got nowhere then, just as it has gotten nowhere now (although statute of limitations has also since expired). And yet the guy was still forced to resign and Boeheim to apologize for defending him in public. Trial by media, great eh?

Sandusky preyed upon those boys . they looked up to him as a hero, and that monster took advantage of all of them. hope there is an extra hot place in hell saved for him

To those asking how a 14 year old could just move away: watch the video interview with the guy, instead of just reading this short summary of an article. In the video, he describes what happened, talks about it in more detail, and it's explained that he moved away to live with his mother. His parents were divorced and he had been living with his father. Before you jump all over the place, eager to find a reason to disbelieve this brave young man who's come forth publicly about being sexually abused as a child (to, as he says, help others who have been sexually abused come forth and tell someone so they can get help and heal)... maybe you ought to hear him out first and hear the whole story! Sheesh...

Believe it or not, child rape and sexual abuse is a lot more common than you probably realize. The stats are shocking... and I can't tell you how many friends and relatives of mine (male and female) have been sexually abused as kids (and sometimes very physically violent/scar-producing abuse), by relatives, strangers, acquaintances, neighbors... this is just one. Try believing him.

The Second Mile charity declared bankruptcy after losing significant funding in the wake of the Sandusky scandal.

Since The Second Mile was started by scumdusky, maybe he'd be willing to part with some of the big bucks that he was pulling down from that charity. Yeah...right...

He was probably looking for monetary compensation which would have damaged his testimony. They had other witnesses with similar stories who were not currently planning civil suits. That is my guess.

He may not have testified because there were no witness to corroborate his story. That doesn't mean his story isn't true, only that his testimony would not have helped to solidify the prosecution's case.

I agree that we can't blame these victims from not coming forward sooner. They were so young - pre-teens! Each had no way of knowing he was not the ONLY boy being abused by this man. They came from troubled families and, as someone else commented, quite likely would NOT have been believed. I can see how many of them were too embarrassed, ashamed or afraid to speak out.

The prosecutor doesn't need every single kid to testify at a trial. More doesn't mean a better chance of conviction. It could lessen it. Also, if they have to have another trial they can use the remaining witnesses in that case.

oh yes, these people knew what was going on...but yes, football is that important to them.

I'd rather ask you wtf this had to do with football? Does it matter if Sandusky was a Democrat?

Unfortunately it was to Joe - it was also all he had to live for - obviously.

My heart goes out to every one of those boys.

Jerry Sandusky is a registered Republican (as was Joe Paterno).

http://www.salon.com/2011/11/09/jerry_sandusky_and_joe_paterno_registered_republicans/

And, no, that doesn't make all Republicans child molesters.

Actually, where football gets drawn into this argument is that people still supported Paterno and Penn State after the story broke out. I'm not an expert on all the information, but from what I've read Paterno did notice his superiors - his superiors just didn't do anything about it, and Paterno didn't pursue the matter any further. His superiors probably didn't want to tarnish the program, but I think Paterno should have done more.

Joe did everything he could, he reported it to the head of the Penn State Police Department, yes, the University police are actual cops, not rent a cops like on many colleges. He reported it as a sexual assault. Joe had no authority to do anything else. Joe was a great man who got railroaded by so many people who needed a scapegoat.

Joe did NOT do everything he could. He did the bare minimum required. He SHOULD have and COULD have pressed the matter until it was properly resolved or turned to real police authorities. No matter what, Joe Paterno dropped the ball too. He could not have been head coach of a fraternity of old buddies without having his own suspicions of foul play.

Cathy, you don't turn gay!

We are relying on evidence that is circumstantial at best and a witness who has changed his story repeatedly. I can see one boy suffering through years of torment or maybe two but keeping a secret like this by as many as there are here boggles the mind In school we had a test where a secret was give to one side of the room and not the other. Then they were told to not tell the secret and to mingle for an hour. When they were tested after that 86% of the entire class knew the secret. I mean you could call somebody and tell them what was going on. Have that guy on TV set up a hidden camera etc but this they say was going on for years. I can see it being hidden in the Catholic church by pervs who have elevated themselves but in regular society? To those of you who were abused my sympathy. To those who are twisting the truth for moetary gain if you are shame on you.

D.D.: Child sexual abuse can cause homosexual behavior in adult life. It's like a conditioned response. Some women become lesbians because of traumatic experiences others become promiscuous. There is a statistical higher incidence of sexual identity issues among adults abused as kids for both men and women.

Debbie-1804583, reading comprehension mustn't be your strong suit. So, let me explain this to you:

The original poster was trying to make a smear based on supposed political affiliation. In response, another poster pointed out that that info was incorrect AND that political affiliation has nothing to do with a person being a potential child molester.

You then respond with George Zimmerman's political affiliation, completely missing the point from the previous poster that pointed out that political affiliation has very little to do with the crime committed here. I'm sure we can all deduce what your political party affiliation is, but that's irrelevant in the end.

Think before you respond.

Let's not forget these were young boys from troubled/broken homes. Perhaps they were afraid to speak out, thinking who's gonna believe them? Or perhaps they kept the secret so they could continue getting the attention and football privileges. Whatever the case, I hope this predator is locked up FOREVER!

RevSpinnaker, please provide reliable sources for those statistics. Perhaps you could use your respectable position as Reverend to interview each of these men to discover how many of them have been turned gay by their childhood sexual abuse. I would like to witness the response of these brave men that dared speak up about the horrors of abuse during their childhood.

While you're at it, seriously question your children and the children of your associate Pastors about how many children of church leaders grow up to be hell raisers, bullies and common criminals. I don't pretend to have any statistics to back me up, but every preacher's kid I ever met was one of the meanest and most devious kids in town. I often wondered why? How 'bout you?

Commonsense

So your saying that being molested as a child doesn't put you at risk for psychological/behavioral problems as an adult? The psychology/psychiatric literature is full of studies showing that it does. As far as personal experience goes, I have had several gay/bisexual friends who said they were introduced to homosexuality as children by adults (that some of the posters here would call sexual predators or pedophiles). Some were prominent members/leaders of the gay community. Some bragged about it proudly stating: "Those priests taught me a lot, they were really good at it!" Please don't interpret this as me painting the whole gay community with the brush of behavioral problems. I'm just responding to your comments. And have you ever heard of a preacher's son named Tim Tebow?

Commonsense, Oprah did a great show for 200 men who had been molested to speak out and get support. Their stories were heart wrenching. The doctor on the show, as well as some of the victims, said that the molestation causes the victims to have confusion about their sexuality. You have to remember that these victims were children when this happened. I know several people who were molested and went through this, male and female. You have to watch the show to understand it and talk to people that have gone through it.

Journal of the American Medical Association (JAMA 2009):

"One half of the victims...often linked their homosexuality to their sexual victimization experiences...The age at the time of the molestation ranged from 4 to 16 with a mean age of 10."

And this from a recent Otago University study in Dunedin, New Zealand

"Of people who reported certain traumatic childhood events, 15% were not heterosexual; of those without such experiences, only 5% were not heterosexual, suggesting that such experiences TRIPLED the chance of later professing homosexual or bisexual inclinations."

FYI, revspinnaker is a nautical term. The upper case R & S seems to bring out the anti-religious zealotry of some people, yourself included.

Lin Nil: Oprah actually did the first show for men who were sexually abused as children 25 years ago. I was there and spoke briefly from the audience. It was her first and last show to include men as victims until last years 200 Man Show. Her political and ratings minded silence only made the problem worse.

Commonsense101- First of all, not all statistics are based on source information. There are thousands of children in our country that are sexually abused on a daily basis, sometimes for years and my heart bleeds for them. Many of them don't tell because they think its "normal", that it's their fault, they are ashamed and/or they or their family members have been threatened if they do. Can you imagine going through that horror, day after day, months after month, sometimes year after year and never being able to tell anyone??? Trust me, the sheer number of boys involved in this is NOT unusual, nor is it that a child can be molested by more than one predator! There are instances where children victims have put themselves into situations where they are abused by persons other than their original abuser because of the "normal" idea or because they are so damaged that they believe that is the only way to be accepted. Trust me- with a place the size of PSU- the abuse of this many boys is easily hidden! Now ask me why I know!!??

@ Pandora:

"Some were prominent members/leaders of the gay community."

Harvey Milk was molested starting at age eleven by several male abusers.

Rev Spinnaker

Thanks for the info and references. I lived in San Francisco for many years and know the Harvey Milk story and its tragic ending. Appreciate your comments.

Rev Spinnaker,

Could you give me the link to those research articles? I'm a person with a psychology degree and I call Bull on your supposed research articles.

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2941402

The purpose of our analysis was to determine if sexual orientation or history of sexual abuse was related ... JAMA. 2010 Jan 20; 303(3):235-41. [JAMA. 2010] Fifth phase of …

"Furthermore, lesbians have reported higher rates of CSA^19,20 and ASA¹⁹ than heterosexual women."

Ed: CSA means childhood sexual abuse. You really need to keep up with recent studies.

Ed: Here's another from the Journal of the American Medical Association.

Sexual Abuse and Lifetime Diagnosis of Somatic Disorders: A Systematic Review and Meta-analysis

"Strong evidence supports a link between childhood sexual abuse and multiple psychiatric sequelae."

That includes gender identity issues.

Ed Saunders

I have a medical degree and find it strange that you have an advanced degree in psychology but you can't find this information on your own. I agree with Rev Spinnaker.

@to ponder . . . . I didn't know that, thanks for the info. It sounds like the campus police (w/real police powers) didn't do anything about it or at least didn't do enough. Why is that???

Well folks, you have now concluded how to end homosexuality forever. Instruct all of the adult female teachers, coaches and church officials to molest your sons at an early age. Instruct all of the adult male teachers, coaches and church officials to molest your daughters at an early age.

According to your reasoning and logic, all of the children will become heterosexual. No more gay pride, gay parades or gay rights. Who would of thought it could possibly be this easy. Don't forget to introduce your young male puppy to an adult b....(female dog) in heat. You wouldn't want him to grow up sniffing the wrong butts.

Y'all amaze me. The man was right. You can't fix stupid.

I love your post. I'm still laughing.

But an accomlice? No, not by choice....I was abused!!!!, stupid

Question did you report it?

Ask the wife if SHE was getting any. I'll bet the answer is no. Been in her shoes before and that is usually a pretty strong indicator that something is going on. And how much denial is this woman in, with all the time this perv spent with boys.

Ebony: dont blame the victim for not speaking out. Do some research about these kinds of crimes. same as priests...Sandusky/PSU program above the law. look at the cover up from the hidden emails from PSU President, saying that it was "humane" not to go after Sandusky 10 years ago. who's going to beleive a 12 year old?

Shame embarassment reliving the pain. dont be an idiot. ijs

And who knows what the dirtbag threatened them with if they told anyone? Also, they were ashamed and feared they would be looked at as freaks.

I, along with several of my cousins (girls), was molested by an uncle. We never told. None of us said a thing until were were adults, at his wake. Kids who are physically abused by a parent will usually deny the abuse and defend the abusive parent. Don't waste your time trying to look for adult reactions to come from children. Children tend to think that they are the reason for anything that happens to them. Mom and Dad divorce, it must be because I was naughty.

A child is from 1 to about 10 or 12 years old, older than that they know what is wrong and what is right and in most cases with boys, they are very outspoken about big things like this. Again unless you are been brought up too conservative, I don't know I have a problem. But not everyone is the same I guess.

Also, remember, that Sandusky was beloved by the whole nation...most rape victims initially think "no one will believe me", imagine if the perpetrator was loved by everyone and famous? I wouldn't have told either...

The hardest thing I've ever had to do was look at my parents while I told them what happened to me...& I was 18. I can still tell when my father is thinking about it. There's sort of this glassy look over his eyes, a sort of sadness.

Ebony have you ever been abused? Assuming not by that question.. Until you have been abused you don't know the shame, emberassment, confusion, and guilt you feel. You don't want anyone to know what happened to you... especially not your parents. And their is the fear of not being believed. When I was raped I confided in 2 people and the response I received was, "you wanted it," "he would never do that," "it's your fault for being in that situation," do you know how fast that shut me up? How I couldnt tell my family because it was my uncle's best friend. And how it affected me and made me not report that time OR the time I was drugged and raped at a Frat house?! It's not something you want to admit to even yourself when it's happening let alone to anyone else. It's a horrible thing and you never want to question or blame the victim... they've done enough of that themselves!

TBF writes the truth. So sorry you and your cousins had to go through that.

So you want to lock me up and throw me in jail because I was raped twice? I was so suicidal after being raped there was no way I could have handled telling my parents, telling the cops, going to court. My word against theirs. I would have been torn apart in court... my reputation up in flames infront of my family. They would have said there was no way that I didnt want it. I had, had sex in the past with other men... so I must've wanted it this time too. I barely lived through college because of what happened because I blamed myself, felt dirty, couldn't sleep at night because it would replay in my brain. If I had admitted it to anyone other than the two people I did tell (one of which blamed me and took the guy's side) I know I would be gone. I tell people to report it when it's happened to them... but I fully understand why people don't, because I am one of them.

Tito, you truly do not know what the F you're talking about! Let's see, take an adult who was sexually abused as a child, have them carry this burden along with the disgrace, humiliation, shame, and fear that they have carried with them their entire life, wait until they hopefully learn to live a productive life after all the BS that's been handed to them by a pedofile and then arrest them because they acted like a child when they were a child. Yup, makes perfect insane sense to me! Get a clue!!!!

I already know about it, but of course these zealots aren't going to read it because then it would not support their lynch-mob mentality.

Also check out the McMartin preschool case.

Everyone says...how could this be a conspiracy, how could so many come up and tell similar stories?

Well people - it's happened before--go read up on the two above cases. And it happened with a lot more counts and a lot more alleged victims.

The McMartin case totaled 300+ children and more than 156 counts against one person and guess what - NONE OF IT HAPPENED. All parties were initially found guilty because everyone said - how could they all be making it up?

Well, later, after some had served several years in prison, investigation proved that it didn't happen. One parent alleged abuse and the cops went hunting for others, fed children (and parents) details, led them into alleged allegations and created a scene similar to a Salem witch trial.

AND LET ME REPEAT - NONE OF IT WAS TRUE. In fact, years later, one alleged victim came forward and said it wasn't true, that he had lied and others had too--they had been told by their parents and investigators to make the accusations.

So for all you "people" and I use that term loosely who says it doesn't happen - people don't band together and make false accusations of this nature, etc., you're dead wrong and history proves it.

It does happen and it happened in the Franklin sex scandal and the McMartin preschool case.

People LIE ABOUT ABUSE, sexual and otherwise. Let's look at another example of someone lying about sexual assault - the former football HS start who spent five years in prison for a rape that he didn't commit. His accuser came forward and admitted he didn't rape her.

So WHY couldn't it be happening here....it could, get your heads out of your butts people

This guy filed a civil suit and all the others will too. This is money driven and don't tell me again that doesn't happen--look at the above cases--civil suits filed there too - and again - IT DIDN'T HAPPEN.

Ebony,

I still haven't told or faced my abuser. If you haven't walked in their shoes, don't even try to assume you know what it feels like. It is the loneliest feeling in the world. The abuser makes you feel that somehow you are the responsible one. And that no one will believe you over them. My heart aches for what these men went through and how brave they are now to come forward, knowing there will people like you who will dare to judge when you have never experienced what they have lived through.

Kimbo,

The McMartin case in California doesn't validate your argument that these men are lying. What positive came from the McMartin case is that we have learned how to better handle accusations of child abuse, especially interviewing the victims. The children in the McMartin case were in DAYCARE, much younger than these victims. Please read the stories of posters who HAVE been victims of abuse and what they went through before you continue to perpetuate theories of conspiracy

Why wait? Because who's going to believe one troubled teen's word over golden boy Jerry Sandusky? As far as these kids knew, each was the only one being abused. This trial is what made some realize they weren't an isolated event.

As adults they'll get a lot farther with these allegations then they would have when they were kids who didn't know how to deal with the abuse, much less who they should go to who wouldn't hide it or shuffle it "off campus". Not to mention Sandusky told at least one of them that they would "never see your parents again" if he told. Once the boys were adults, they couldn't be hurt by his actions and could do more to protect themselves and their families from the man and his supporters/enablers.

Not only is this case a glimpse into childhood sexual abuse, but how common it is. Another hint about how common Sandusky types are: there are an estimated 300,000 American children forced into prostitution/sex industry, pimped out at really young ages (even age 5 or 6); and this doesn't include the international child sex trafficking epidemic which attracts mostly westerners (including lots of Americans, mostly men.) What does this tell you? There are a LOT of adults who pay to have sex with children (aka rape them.) How many daily customers do each of those 300,000 children have? I don't even want to do the math, but that's a lot. Who are these men? Well, they're guys like Sandusky! Well-known, respected men, everday family men, and men of all walks of life... and lots of them, apparently, seek this out, whether it's in their own homes with some kid they know or whether they pay another adult to do it.

What is wrong with our world? What is going on???!!! The only good that can possibly come out of a case like this is that it might shed light on how huge of a problem pedophilia and child sexual abuse and exploitation really is-- meaning-- how many adults are this disturbed and depraved. If you have this kind of tendency-- please, PLEASE get some help from a therapist!

Most children years ago did not tell anyone. I was molested/abused as a child (relative), I never told any for more than 40 years, in my parents own home, often wondered years later how did they never catch what was happening I was only 5 when it started, kids really are scared to tell anyone especially when they are told if you do you will never see your parents again. I deal with it, it never goes away totally, you always remember. now almost 65 and I can still see it, remember it as though it was yesterday. Was I later in life promiscuous, yes, Do I regret it, yes, have my relationships suffered from the past, I do believe so. Sad part is a am a good loving person however the past never totally goes away. My heart goes out to each and everyone of those boys/men. Do I think his wife knew, absolutely! Do I believe these boys/men, oh yes absolutely!

"I Object To Your Objection"

LOL

I...CAN'T...LIE!!!!!

The Truth, "YOU CANT' HANDLE THE TRUTH"!!!!!!!!!!

wascigarman - you are and idiot, obvisouly you have never been molested or abused, I was 5 when mine started never said a word until some 40 years later, people who do not understand should never open their mouths.

12 year old boy 'my father is doing bad things to me.....'

School counselor 'don't make up lies about your father'

Principal 'you should be ashamed of yourself'

Mother 'oh your father loves you. He would never do anything to hurt you'

12 year old boy never stands up to the bullies because he is sure he deserves it. He has low self esteme, hides in the basement after he runs home from school. He has no friends and no one to confide in.

He learns to keep it to himself

'No one cares'

30 years later mother 'If I had only known'........................

Now tell me why they never came forward as a child.

until you have been there you can only guess......

Uuuhh...you may have a point. Then again, you may be cognitively challenged. I wouldn't wish being forced into weird sex on anyone, but I find myself wishing it would have happened to you or someone close to you, and then hear what your opinion would be. Just sayin', Mr. Know-It-All.

Really? You don't believe any of these kids statements? What happened to them as children was traumatic, and something like this is usually not reported because of the shame and guilt they may have felt. Therefore, the experience and the memories are BURIED. They don't talk about it because they may not feel anyone would believe their story, especially when the alleged molester is someone of Sanducky's position in the community.

Sandusky was already retired when McQueary saw what he saw, so Sandusky was no longer on the ladder for McQueary to step over. Please get your facts straight before throwing around such baseless accusations.

That's one big conspiracy theory you have there. You think it's more likely that eight men conspired to lie about Sandusky and McQueary conspired to lie about Sandusky in the same fashion to further his career? Have you been molested/sexually abused? No? I already knew that from you post. If you had been you would understand how hard it is to come forward about it, how a child feels responsible for what happened to them by nature. The person who should get a life is you.

Proof? Speaking out sooner? really...clearly you don't have a clue as to what these young men lived through.

The reason it took so long is because someone finally got brave enough to say something and then all sh!t hit the fan. Those who have been molested think they are the only victims; they don't realize that there are usually many, many, many more. It isn't until someone does finally get the bravado to say something that others will think, "Holy crap, I wasn't the only one!" And it bolsters the bravado of others to come forward too. That's why there are so many in this case. Slimedusky was molesting kids for years before someone finally stepped up. So it's slimedusky's word against the accusers, huh? So all TEN of these guys are all lying? All TEN are out to get him? All TEN are in it for the money? All TEN of them got together and said, "Lets get this guy?" Nope. Get your head out of the sand and smell the coffee, cuz this guy is as guilty as hell.

What 'proof' would be sufficient for you?? See it for yourself? No 'testimony' is proof I suppose, you have to believe it or not . . . This testimony was pretty strong in my opinion . . . what 'proof' do you want to see? The coach who testified, you think ths is going to HELP? his career? Really?

no real proof?! he was not doing it out in front of everyone - he got caught in the shower- we know for a fact he spent ALOT of time alone with these kids and gave them gifts - all 10 of them tell virtually the same story how he operated and that he had sex with all of them - plus he will not testify - so all of the victims tell the same graphic story and they are lying - i guess you support the catholic priests that have done this for years - no justice - get over it - stop complaining - easily said when you are not the victim - typical sheep take the side of authority - or a meaningless belief - many moronic statements - the biggest being mcqueary said something to get ahead - - no he was afraid to say anything and was hesitant because he did not want to LOSE HIS JOB GENIUS - what a tool

What sort of "proof" would you like to see in order to decide Sandusky's guilt or innocence? There is almost NEVER any "proof" available when a child has been sexually molested by an adult...especially if intercourse did not occur. Oh, and I'm certain McQueary took the steps he took because he thought it would elevate him "up the ladder"...can you HEAR yourself???? McQueary was probably advised by many to keep a lid on what he saw/heard concerning Sandusky because his career would be OVER if he officially reported the incident to anyone who would/could actually do something about it. McQueary was just another victim in this whole cover-up for Sandusky. No one, least of all Joe Paterno, wanted to bring shame on Penn State football...THAT's the travesty here.

no proof?! There was eyewitness testimony by McQueery and another janitor whose health prevents him from testifying now but who detailed what he saw at the time. These eyewitness accounts corroborate the stories told by the young men and it is extremely disturbing to hear that potential rebuttal by Matt Sandusky is what made Jerry decide not to take the stand. Believe me - I knew and I bet my brothers suspected too, when our never prosecuted (now dead) pedophile father had a new victim in his sites - the fawning and grooming in safe territory for a kid with little good in their life is what set the stage for escalating horrors to come. Not telling secrets like we ate ice cream for lunch move to more unsavory secrets and threats that sound plausible to a kid with nowhere safe to turn.

is that you jerry?

Wow wasc... I have to say...in all the months of reading posts by people on these websites about this case...yours... is by far....the MOST ignorant and obtuse statement of them all. I thank God you are not on that jury and pray that you are NEVER on any jury because...obviously...common sense and even a sliver of intelligence, is not your forte.

Allegations? These men, as boys, suffered physical, mental and emotional abuse! Each one of their lives were forever changed by the abuse suffered by them - they are truly scarred for life. If Sandusky abused even only one child then, I hope, that there is a special place in hell for him.

Take a good look at him. What more proof do you need?

Your statement boggles the mind. but if you would, pleas open your mind just *this much* and consider this: Each one of these men that testified grew up in circumstances that you may or may not have lived... these kids likely came from broken homes with no father around. When you're a single mom and you have a son, you would like to have a positive "father figure" or role model around for your child. As such, that's where the second mile came in - some place where kids could have the same opportunities and guidance from families in a two parent household. And likely when you are 10, 11, 12 you don't question authority and when you are raped by a grown man, you're ashamed (and probably made to feel ashamed) of what happened to your body. You don't understand and its likely that your mom was under so much stress and anxiety from the situation you were living in (having to work outside the home, no support system, etc.) you don't want to add to that by telling your mom what is happening to you.. Or worse - you're AFRAID no one will believe you. (and in one instance in this case - that's exactly what happened). And lets not forget for a moment - that whoever did this to you - probably threatened you to keep you quiet. They even gave you stuff you never thought you would own or took you places you'd never thought you'd see. It tends to mess with your psyche. and so you deal. the person who abused you, knows that you have no support group to turn to - no one to tell - there's no dad to be afraid of.

This investigation started well over 13 years ago. people have lied, a district attorney has mysteriously disappeared and don't you find it the least bit odd that this case never blew up until ONE WEEK AFTER JOE PATERNO BECAME THE WINNINGEST COACH OF ALL TIME? Does that not scream to you COVER UP?

I believe Joe Paterno knew, and he knew A LOT. I think it was an edict that if you see anything that may affect Penn State Footbal team then you go to Joe. Joe Paterno is equally guilty for continuing to allow Jerry Sandusky to be in the locker room with those kids - IF McQueary told him anything (even without going into detail) it should flip the switch in his little head - its not right that this man continues to be in contact with these kids.

Maybe this sicko, wascigarman, was just disappointed there wasn't a video of it as proof for him to enjoy. I hope people don't leave their children alone with you and don't trust you to watch them since you think kids lie about being sexually abused!

no PROOF... and this is Exactly why people don't come forward when they have been raped/secually abused. Unless you report immediately after the incident and have a rape kit done there isn't physical proof (and even with a rape kit there isn't always any physical evidence)... it's one person's word against another. The same people who keep saying that people need to come forward and report... are the people asking where is the physical evidence... the hard proof.

Who cares if you LIKE the charges or not? Who cares if you understand anything about the victims or how pedophiles work? I mean really, who cares? You obviously have no clue...so the idea that you don't like something doesn't mean a whole lot. Go educate yourself.

Mr. Clarke is that all you know how to post? Please show us you have some intelligence and post an original thought on this case.

Jerry Sandusky will be convicted and rightfully so (if the jury has any common sense).

No, Kevin H. You apparently haven't checked out the Franklin sex scandal or you would know the damn point he's trying to make.

The point he is trying to make is that PEOPLE LIE ABOUT ABUSE - EVEN SEXUAL ABUSE.

It has happened in the past. Groups of people claiming sexual abuse that just didn't happen, all accusing the same people with the same details and it didn't happen.

That is the point he's trying to make and the rest of you idiots are so stupid that you can't even fathom that these people have a monetary motive and could actually be lying.

300+ children and their parents lied about satanic, rituatlist sexual deviant behavior against a preschool (McMartin) and you know what? It wasn't true--all made up!

Everyone acquitted, of course after some of them spent years in prison for something that was a lie.

That's the point he's trying to make and I'm 100% behind him.

Yes, several people can accuse someone of something, with similar details and all be lying - has happened before - read up on Franklin and McMartin and then come back here and make an informative post--right now--you're full of BS.

An event doesn't cease to have happened just because someone doesn't tell about it immediately. How many secrets have been divulged on someone's death bed throughout history?

What real proof do you have that McQueary and the janitor are lying? Yes, you do have to prove them lairs once they swear to what they saw. So there!

@Barb Kinney--

Oh yes wasacigarman may have a point--and I suggest a comb-over and a hat for it--that way it won't be so noticeable to other people.

Smart enough.... go back to 3rd grade and learn CONTRACTIONS!!!!!!!!!!!

You are holding these children to the same standards you would hold an adult. Not only is that logically unsound, it shows how unfamiliar you are with the case and its terms.

Have you ever heard of "grooming?" That's what pedophiles do to keep the silence and trust of their victims. Please, I encourage you to do some more reading before you place demands on innocent children who did not have the best support systems at home. (That is, after all, how Sandusky had access to them through his charity.)

The kids involved did not have parents to go to. They were foster kids.

So you're calling these boys prostitutes, Pamela? Really? WOW....

You're one sick cookie! Insinuating these CHILDREN paid for the "mentoring" Sandusky gave them with sexual favors??? With people like you in the world there's no need for there to be a hell in the afterlife, just leave the "bad" people here with you and those that are like-minded.

You're kinda retarded, aren't you?

pamela - you win for the stupest post ever - congrats - these were kids genius - poor , lonely kids - thats why he chose them - .... blaming the kids really how dumb is this country - let me guess no evolution for you - not so much that you believe in it , because im sure you dont , but that it never happened to you - crawl back to the river

you don't tell because the perp convinces you to keep the secret. "You'll go to jail too" or "Your family will disown you because you liked it" or "I will kill your mother or your dog or you if you tell anyone" or "Noone will believe you" and "I love you" are all lies that the child's brain is ill-equipped to rebut. Plus one's life may be so troubled that losing the genuine support of someone who says they love you or for these boys, losing the gifts and status of being a favorite of their hero were scarier than the abuses. The guilt and shame of feeling complicit because your body can feel pleasure even though your brain is screaming FOUL - it all fosters silence.

You, Pamela are beyond scum. I hope the heartlessness you are showing in your post, is returned to you someday...ten fold.

Pamela, you are clearly and idiot! The end...

@PamelaHarvey I have NEVER heard such stupidity in my life! You are the BIGGEST idiot I have ever came into contact with. IDIOT! Go get educated you DUMB B***H!!!!!!

A lot of these boys were from troubled homes and may not have had the relationship with their parents that would allow such intimate communications. They were sent/attended the Second Mile program to have that male figure in their lives to help them. They were for the most part "ideal" victims. Plus the average pedifile uses coersion, guilt, fear [LOVE] and threats to get the kids to remain silent. It is not always a choice for the kid and/or they are leveraged/threatened into silence. This is why the law allows kids to report the abuse several years after the fact because it may be AT THAT TIME they feel free to speak up. Not before.

You are a product of the system in which you grew up. Just like a young African American girl should "expect" to be raped by her mother's/sister's/aunt's boyfriend just so she can get new clothes at the hospital that she is taken to after the fact?? That is a real and common occurrence and your post is practically proof of that belief system. Sick, sick, sick.

Troll.

I'm going to call TROLL on this post. I refuse to believe anyone is that heartless & ignorant. Disgusting.

I hope you don't have children, because if something like this happens to them, they will never come to you to tell you about it.

Pamela Harvey's Facebook page states that she is in Management at the US Dept. of Veterans' Affairs. I hope she doesn't think that our brave vets desreved to be wounded, or killed, because they were given rations....same ignorant thought process. No doubt she's one of many there who think that PTSD isn't real too.

Theresac007's blank post is more intelligent than yours, Pamela. You are either the biggest and most ignorant moron on the face of the planet or a troll.

And John-2412130 is absolutely correct! This woman claims to be a manager at the VA!! Perhaps they would be interested in her ideas on child sexual abuse victims??? As a taxpayer who pays her salary, I'm certainly outraged.

Is that you Dottie?

did you not hear . he did the boy not the other way around this case is now so messed up

What the hell does that matter Cathy? Abuse is abuse. If you think the fact that he "did the boy" and not the other way around...ceases to make it wrong and make it abuse you are sadly mistaken. I hope you have no children who ever get abused and run to you for help.

I am sorry for what happened to your daughter. I hope you moved away from this man and got her some counseling.

Yes, the ultimate punishment, move 'em to Texas

It is tough to say what you'd do if you were a kid in the same circumstances. Sure, right now we all say we'd have killed the bastard or at least told someone. I think the same thing. I also wonder why all alleged victims didn't spill their guts for so long, but it is hard to believe there's no fire with all this smoke.

You aren't a 10 year old either. So, if that happened to you at age 10 or 12 - you would have come back with a weapon and cut his unit off - right. I believe you.

you are an effen idiot.

A child is not capable of dealing with this type of trauma, they will suppress or act out in different ways. Time has to pass for the human mind to mature and then its able to process these events is a way that his healing to the victim. Even then its hard, this of adult men and women who have been raped, its a hard thing to recover from.

Our son was abused when he was young (6 or so up to 12 or so??). We were too naive to realize anything was happening. These perverts are very clever and brainwash the kids and entice them with gifts (at least this guy gave our son some pretty nice things). It took our son until he was 30 years old to say anything about it!!!! The guy also told our son that my husband (his father)didn't love him. For some reason these poor kids are afraid to speak up - I'm pretty sure if ours had said something I would have been very suspicious. Anyway, there's nothing unusual about the kids not speaking up - and letting it happen again and again. I don't understand that part, but it happens and it's disgusting. Again, these perverts are cunning, sly, depraved individuals, as is Mr. Sandusky. His interviews are enough to let everyone know that he's sick and absolutely needs to serve time in jail (where he will be punished by the perverts there who love doing the things that he did to the boys - he "will get his" and then some!!!).

To Jakey Boy, THANKS!!! your statements may help some here on this sight who don't understand the methods used by these predetors. They can use LOVE that special commodity which we al crave, in a twisted way to gain the loyalty trust and even love of the kid. There are so many cases where it was shown that the victim fell in love over time with the person victimizing them. I think they called it the "Stockholm Syndrone". Gifts, love, fear, threats and LIES can be tools used to manipulate a young child's mind.

Don't let your kids be approached, befriended, do sleep overs with ANY person that may be able to victimize your child. Teach your children what to watch for and try try try not to let them into potentially inappropriate situations before they are 15-16.

Thanks, Jakey, for saying what you did. What people don't get is that a "good" pedophile can put a hand up a little romper while a child is on his lap with the parents in the room and no one will know. Seriously. They are good at what they do, unfortunately, and good at picking who is vulnerable.

Sam,

I used to think that if someone ever tried to rape me, I'd scream and do whatever I could to get away, and I'd hurt them.

When it came down to it, I clammed up. I didn't do what I thought I'd do. It's terrifying, you can't be prepared for it, especially when it's someone you know and TRUST. It's easy to say "I would do X, Y, Z"...but you can't know until you're in the situation.

Maybe you're a coward. And FU

Jessica, my follow up comment was not meant for you, it was meant for Fedup. I bet he got his azz kicked every day when he was a kid by guy's like me.

They did not deserve the treatment from anyone, but hey these are boys and usually they do not fear and they should have spoken out about it a long time ago. What prompted it to come out now? That's all.

Rodolfo, you are showing your ignorance. If you don't honestly know go back up and read all the posts by people who have a clue. Yes, they do "fear" and no, they often don't speak out. Educate yourself.

What prompted it to come out now?

Because they found out there are many more who experienced the same crap which likely gave them the courage to speak up. Victims don't just wake up one morning, call the cops and say, "I was abused as a child by so-n-so." You hope to God you never have to talk about it because it's shameful and you think no one will believe you anyway (point proven by posts on this vine) but when you meet or hear of others who have that kind of (sick) "connection", you change your mind about holding it in for eternity. You actually believe that someone out there can believe you because they've been there. Unless you've experienced something like this yourself, you can't relate to the affect it has on your thought processes. I'm thankful you've never been in their shoes, seriously, I am.

Rodolfo-

First, I was 18, so I can't imagine being a small child going through this, and honestly, what the guy went through was worse.

I told a couple people at first, and had they not so vehemently argued that by me coming forward, I could prevent this from happening again, I don't think I would have told the cops. It was torture having to go through the rape kit, where two people came into my hospital room to take PICTURES. It was torture to tell the officer over my case IN DETAIL what happened, even though I knew he had worked cases like mine a thousand times, and heard stories much worse, it was so hard to tell him. It was my decision to accept a plea deal, making him go to jail for 6 months, instead of standing in a court full of people, describing what happened...I don't think I could have handled it...I even pulled myself out of high school because of this (but-I had enough credits to graduate and get a diploma from a home-school program).

It feels disgusting. It's a filth you can't wash off no matter how hard you try. It's nightmare after nightmare reliving it. You don't want people's opinions of you to change once they know. Personally, I also didn't want pity. You feel worthless. It raises so many emotions and questions. I am a completely different person now because of it. If it rocked my world so much while I was 18, imagine what a 10 year old is going through?

& about how boys are usually "outspoken"...With how most people view gays, you expect a young boy to confess a man did this to him? He'd be afraid of what his peers would think!

You are absolutely right Jessicalc. Survivors of male on male sexual abuse repeatedly say how humiliating and difficult it is for them to come forward b/c it was same sex abuse. Rodolfo is obviously carrying the "machismo" thing WAY too far, and applying it to little boys who are just that ... little boys.

Young males (and even ADULT males) who are abused by another male not only have to go thru the horrible ordeal of having been molested, but also the fear, humiliation and stigma of having been victimized by another male.

But I don't think Rodolfo will ever quite "get it," though.

You are right. Some people will never get it. I dealt with some men that had been raped in prison. All said the same thing: "I should have died before I let that happen to me." This was years after the rapes. They still feel the shame and disgust with themselves. Rape destroys everything they knew about themselves as men and wipes out any self-esteem they may have had. No one deserves to be raped. No, they don't tell. They only told me for medical reasons that worried them. I got them help and I did all I could to track down the perps. I think it helped...At least I like to think that I made a difference...maybe not. It was sad to hear their stories.

Rodolfo Fuentes - dont speak unless you know what you are talking about, you can read other posts from me if you wish, abused/molested children dont speak I was very young never told anyone until more than 40 years later. So SHUT the hell up

What you said of where they prey at is right on. So why not end the programs....

These programs have been around for ages. They are desighned specificly

for that purpose....Just like prisons..prisons are desighned to produce just

what our society will condem. In turn, our democratic society is hated through

out the world because it is desighned to feed itself at a high price of destroying

it's own. we create our own then destroy our own.....get to know your enemy first

then you'll begin to see the forrest thru the trees.......

'Save a Deer, shoot a pedophile'

Huh?

'Save a Deer, shoot a pedophile'.

You can eat a deer, dude. Only thing Sandusky's good for is wasting oxygen that decent people could be breathing.

Instead of deer hunting - use that bullet on a pedophile.

kill a deer, eat a deer....sandusky ate meat, so what is the difference.

Words are more damaging in our society if not used properly.

And he used words (wisely) to entrap this kids. Just check the words

used on some of these posts..Let the courts do their job and not get

caught in spewing out uglyness. Ugly comments are contagious and

fuel more ugliness thru these posts......

I agree, how can you be abused and then put it in the back of your mind and wait so many years to talk about it and also when others are talking about it, not with his own initiative.

Who told you, Rodolfo, that boys "don't fear?" Sad, sad day when victims are being blamed. And yes, that IS what you are doing. Please read through the responses of survivors for their take on WHY they didn't speak up. Please, if you took the time to type such comments, please take the time to read some as well.

Laker, maybe that is how you think. Doesn't mean it is how he thinks.

Laker and Rodolfo - I don't think ANY amount can make up for what this monster did to him. So what if he wants compensation? Don't most victims of a crime want the perpetrator to pay for it? And not just jail time. His life was ruined by this man.

Rodolfo...People can make themselves forget almost anything. They don't put it in the back of their mind. They just wipe it out of their thought process and pretend that it never happened. But, it is there and it comes out in strange and often destructive ways. They forget because they feel guilty--that somehow or someway they caused it to happen or didn't do enough to prevent it from happening. They blame themselves and turn that anger inward...some don't survive. Do you ever read anything but comic books? This isn't new information you know.

Rodolfo Fuentes & laker steve - you can supress it and live with it, never goes away you remember always I was 5 now almost 65 so shut up if you dont know what the hell your talking about - you are all idiots to think young children tell "fear" is all you need to know. CLOSE YOUR FREAKING MOUTHS

you are way off base, he wasnt asked to testify because his case was old, they wanted to get the more recent ones for obvious reasons, he did testify to grand jury they just decided they had a strong case and went with the 8 witnesses that they felt gave them the best chance for conviction.

If this kid gets some money that would otherwise go towards sandusky or to benefit the school that harbored him I am all for it.

I would be happy too, Maria.

I was abused by my brother for 10 years. I finally told my parents when I was 16--and was accused of lying and manipulating the family. I was told to repress it--which I did--until it reared its ugly head in my 30's. I went through extensive therapy (twice a week for a year, and that's pretty darn good all things considered) to deal with the trauma of the experience. Official diagnosis? Post-traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)

One of the symptoms of PTSD is avoidance. Consider it a mental pain killer: the mind blocks out the trauma. This is one reason why people don't come forward. For some, the mind blocks it out completely for years until some event triggers a memory that brings forth the trauma. That's one reason why victims don't come forward.

For children, they often don't understand what is happening to them is wrong (that was my case for years), or they're told to be silent or XYZ will happen to them. Fear, confusion, and anxiety are all reasons why victims don't come forward.

In a case such as this, I'm certain this person felt he was the only victim. Once others began to emerge, it can help such a victim as this young man gain the courage and acceptance to acknowledge the abuse and deal with it.

I could write a tome on this topic, but want to make one thing perfectly clear: NO PERSON has the right to sexually abuse another, no matter what age or circumstance. NO VICTIM is at fault for the abuse. Those to say otherwise--as many of the posters here have--are exactly the reason why victims stay silent. Your ignorance and incorrect perception perpetuates such abuse.

I hope this answers your question, Maria. If you need further evidence of explanation as to why victims stay silent, see Pamela, Ebony, and Tito's baseless and ignorant posts.

I am a child abuse survivor, and I WILL speak up. I was all of 8 years old when a man in my neighborhood started paying a lot of attention to me when I was playing outside with a number of other children. That man culled me out of the herd because pedophiles can sense when a child craves attention or is otherwise a "perfect mark". Eventually, the man got me alone and convinced me that what he was doing to me was what people do when they "care about each other". He also cautioned me to "keep it between just us, because it was special". I came from a family where my father was mean, cold, and completely emotionally unavailable...so, I was the perfect mark for this man. As I grew older and realized what had happened was shameful, there was NO way I was EVER going to tell anyone about it. I never did...until three years ago. The incident happened almost 50 years ago, but it marked me in ways I can never fully explain. Every victim has his/her breaking point when it comes to recognizing and confronting abuse. Please don't blame the victim. They are not just a victim for the duration of the abuse - they are a victim for life.

Hi Maria - When I was nine my swim team coach looked at me and said 'If you ever tell anyone about this I will kill your parents and then I will kill you.' Forty one years later and I can still see exactly what he looked like when he said it. This man would hit me if I tried to resist his abuse. At nine I was brave enough to say no, but he brutalized me. At nine I truly believed this monster would kill my parents and me. I stayed quiet for decades after that.

For every one of you who is blaming the victims, has nothing ever happened to you or someone you care about that was out of your or their control? These men were troubled, vulnerable children when Sandusky did his damage. He knew that, pedophiles seek out these types of children knowing they are easy marks. So shame on you. I submit that you are either sympathetic pedophiles or simply to pathetically ignorant to be posting your thoughts on the Internet.

I did tell my mom...about my father!!! she didn't believe me and said "Shame on you for saying such a thing" "Do you know what could happen to HIM if you say something like that?" I'm 46, been to counseling & on meds and it still makes me sick remembering...... It is so so difficult not to be believed.

Thank you, sweet people :) I wanted someone who endured it to explain in to ADULTS in their words why a child wouldn't speak up sooner. I applaud you for your courage and am sad those things happened to you -- the stifling/denial of it as much as the actual abuse.

1

do you have kids? start asking the questions now. they may not know how to

answer you....I didn't know, or who to turn to...I thought it was normal.....

I'm 75 yrs old now and consider myself to be two persons in one body, because

I still (hear from you) how I was wronged. so I have to choose what society says.

You know, the majority still rules. I'm a person still living as an abused person

fighting the abnormality of it all....There is more damage to an abused person

than what you can begin to imagine.....some comments made on these posts

are just plain full of nonsense. I wouldn't wish the abuse on my worst enemy.

I was also a victim of sex abuse by my father from age 8 to 11. I never told anyone because of the fear, of him ( very mean, violent man), shame, disgust with myself, and also worried that no one would believe me or if they did, I would be the one responsible for the breakup of my family (what little security I had at the time). It took me until I was in my late 30s before I could get counseling and begin to heal, but it still affects my life in many ways and always will. No child has the bravery to stop this or speak up when its happening.

I was sexually abused as a kid, by countless men and boys. The first time I was abused I was five years old. It was an “old Grandpa type” neighbor. He was abusing girls and boys. I was abused at 10 by neighbor teenage boys; two of them together. Then at 11 by my dad and moms best friend that had know and lived by me my entire life. Then the summer between sixth and seventh grade I was gang raped, by six boys of all different ages, but older than me. Then in eight grade I was raped by and older boy in the chapel of a Mormon church. When I was in high school, it was my English teacher (my entire sophomore year), who also happened to be a Mormon Seminary teacher. Then I was date raped in high school, also.

I grew up in a very nice middle class neighborhood in Salt Lake, high east bench. The common thread was the neighborhood. These people were all my neighbors. They were kids I went to school with and their siblings and their friends.

For years I had a secret bag packed, because I knew in my mind, if my parents ever found out what I had done, they would kick me out of the house. I also believed that I should run away, because I wanted to save them from the embarrassment that was me.

When I got gang raped I was so mad that they had ripped my brand new out fit that I went to talk to the parents of the all the boys, because I thought they should buy me a new outfit. The parents all laughed at me.

I would black out when a lot of this would happen. I believe it was because I was so emotional and physically over loaded that could not handle it. I would sit in the bath tub for hours with tons of soap, hoping the sticky would all go away. I had evil, vile, nasty nightmares.

My mom new about “the coach” (the English teacher was also the coach), and she told me once she thought it was what I wanted to do. A couple of my friends thought I had been date raped.

You do not tell anyone because you had a child’s mind, a young teenagers mind; you do not have an adult mind. You believe it is only happening to you. You believe you have done something very wrong to deserve this. You are horrifically embarrassed. You are bullied and torment by these people; they think you are a slut.

I could go on and on about what it does to you, how it happens, why it happens, and all that you live with for the rest of your life.

I do know one thing, once I figured out a few things I have never stopped talking about it. I tell everyone. I can not being to tell you how many times I have hears: “I have never told anyone this before…….”

I was abused by my cousin when I was 7-8 years old. I agree with the already stated reasons for not coming forward.

Another thing people need to understand about these predators is that they work to develop a deep, meaningful relationship/attachment prior to any abuse taking place. Another reason I didn't tell was in my 7-8 year old mind this was a person I loved. I couldn't separate what they were doing from that. I was worried about the trouble he would be in if I told because he had gotten me to care for him. So I did what many victims do and I pushed it away from my mind.

When it resurfaced in my teens I was convinced no one would believe me, and that I would be blamed as many people on these boards are doing.

It wasn't until intense counseling at college and the motivation that I did not want my rapist to attend my wedding that I finally came forward.

I came forward only to find out that his stepsister had been abused as well, and her father was blamed for it because they never suspected it could be the brother. Do you have any idea the guilt I felt? Even though my head knows that I was a child and the only one to blame was the sicko who did this- my heart still aches for any one else he hurt and I wish I was able to process it all at the time and speak up. To have people on here claiming the victims should hold some responsibility makes me sick.

We live with enough guilt, shame, trauma, etc as it is, and I hope you or your children never experience that kind of horror. But of course, that means you will never understand what we have gone through.

Frhawk - You mother had what I call the typical pedophile wife attitude: “better you, than me, having a blinds eye to everything because it makes life easier, and claiming to know nothing to save face and her meal ticket”. This happens so much, because the woman does not know how to live on her own, she fears what people will think and say and in her mind it is just impossible. I had a friend years ago that was sexually abused by her father and grandfather, in the very same bed her mother and grandmother were sleeping in. Both women went to their graves claiming to never know what was happening right next to them. The mothers, wives, grandmothers are as sick as their men!!!!!!!!

I would like to apologize to you for what happened to you. You do have a sisterhood out there, that will listen.

kristi-4734591 - I once heard an abuser on Oprah say; “that I killed all that she could have been by abusing her.” Each person handles the abuse very differently, because each person is different. No one story is the same, no one moment in time is the same, and no after effect is the same.

What I do know; I am not who I could have been had I not been abused. I am who I am because I was abused. There is Good in Bad and Bad in Good, you just have to see it. God never gives you bad without some good and God never gives you good without some bad, you just have to see it.

I am very compassionate and very empathic. I have a very loud and strong voice and I demand to be heard, because I speak up when I see injustice and wrong. I fight and push back when I believe a wrong has been done. Being abused did that.

See I am 55 years old and you are a tad older than my mother. My grandmother was abused by her dad, my mother was abused by her brother, I was abused by my neighborhood, my nephew was abused at his day care and the very worst one of all, was my daughter was abused, at the age of three, by her biologically; because her stupid ass mother (me) could not believe her father would do that to her. Needless to say my daughter never saw her biological again after that.

I apologize to you; for the past was in a far darker spot, than we are today. In the past you were not aloud to speak about such matters and chastised to hell if you did. You to have a sisterhood, in all of us.

My heart breaks to read these stories of childhood abuse, and as trite as this sounds, I do wish y'all the best life offers going forward. We humans are such resilient survivors, capable of not only overcoming the dark, evil past, but changing the world in telling the truth & bringing light to this darkness.

Why don't kids tell, some ask? Listen, I was never sexually abused, but I was beaten plenty. Even when bleeding and bruised, I still had folks disbelieve me! If people can deny the evidence right in front of their eyes of abuse, then how easy is it to deny that which you can't see?

I was a hellraiser, so I told - angrily and often. Not only did it make things worse for me at home (more beatings) nobody listened or gave a damn. So I moved to Texas on my own at 17 to get away. Over 30 years later, when I think of the past, I just look at my great job, fine home, and luxury car, remind myself that success is the best revenge, and smile. But the greatest success is in overcoming - I didn't let the bastard get me down!

Thank you all for sharing your stories of being sexually abused. I think people need to hear more about it, to begin to understand how common it is and hopefully, eventually, our society can create fewer and fewer abusers and make it ok for people to tell others when it has happened.

I've never been sexually abused, but I can't tell you how many friends and relatives have told me about abuse they suffered as kids. The first time I heard a story like this was when I was about 13, from a new friend of mine at the time. She'd asked if I wanted to go for a walk, and as we walked, she ended up telling me about how she had been raped by her step father when she was 6. Luckily, her mother did find out and left him... ended up a single mom with several kids, but at least that didn't happen to them anymore. Several others, throughout my teens and 20s would end up telling me their pasts with sexual abuse and rape--horrible, horrible things. Some of them have physical scar tissue in their genital areas from the sexual rape and abuse and some of them don't even remember how it happened (some do, after years of no memory). Obviously something terrible did happen (I have seen those scars in some cases), regardless of whether the person remembers yet. Boys and girls. Sometimes it would be "I've never told anyone this before..." and then they'd tell me. One even told of how she told her father about what had happened and he didn't believe her, so she had to live on, seeing that man sometimes, after he had molested her and her father disbelieved it. Sometimes they had blocked it out mentally, so that they had no memory of what had happened, until something later on in life triggered images in their heads and then the memories would flood back. As someone else said, that's classic PTSD symptom--memory loss for a period of time. I know how this can happen, because I've had it happen with a different kind of traumatic event in my childhood-- once when, in adulthood, my brother was reminiscing about the past and mentioned something and I said "I don't know what you're talking about. I don't remember that." I had no idea what he was talking about. He kept saying "come on, remember..." and all of a sudden, that incident popped back into my head. It was the wierdest thing. I guess it was upsetting enough that somehow my brain just stashed it away, until I couldn't ignore it once I was reminded of it. I guess that's how someone can not remember abuse, until later. It happens a lot. And, if you listen to some of the accounts of Sandusky's accusers-- one said that he remembers showering with him, and remembers Sandusky picking him up and squeezing him, and then he blacked out and doesn't remember anything after that until later in the dressing room. What do you think happened there? I would guess something so traumatic and physically painful that he passed out or just checked out mentally and still doesn't remember. Someday, he may. So, for those who just don't believe this man or doubt how someone could suddenly remember or decide to speak up, I can say, it's really common with people who have been raped or sexually abused as children. It's a known reaction to that kind of trauma, as other survivors of abuse have explained here.

Anyway, good for you, everyone who's survived this type of abuse for sharing your story, and for speaking up when you finally did... I wish you continued healing. And, I hope there is justice in this court case.

Ok, I will. We were very poor. My mother was a waitress and we ate scraps from the restaurant. The two guys next door had HOTCHOCOLATE. They offered it to my sister and I and we took it...but there was a pony ride first. We were told not to play over there. We thought we would get in big trouble if Mom found out about the hotchocolate and that we were there. We had no idea what the rest of it was about. We were 4 and 5 years old.

Kim from Utah -

Well Done!!!